The myth: leader = best player
Most people think the leader on a team is the best player. The one who scores the most goals. The one with the best stats. The one they show on TV. But that's one of the biggest myths in sports.
A leader isn't the fastest or the most technically skilled. A leader is the one who gets up first after a loss. Who speaks up in the locker room when it's quiet. Who grinds at practice even when they don't feel like it. Who does one extra sprint when nobody's watching. Who says "let's go" when everyone else wants to quit.
I've known players with incredible talent. But in the locker room, they were invisible. When the team was losing, they hid behind their stats. When things got tough, they waited for someone else to speak up. And then I've known players who weren't the fastest or most skilled -- but the team would follow them into a fire. Because they knew this person meant it. That they brought the same intensity to practice as they did to games. That when they said "we need to step it up," they were already doing it themselves.
The armband means nothing if there's no behavior to back it up. And the opposite is also true -- you can lead a team without wearing one. Because leadership isn't a position. It's a decision. It's something you choose every day, every practice, every game.
LeBron James: "Leadership isn't about being the best. It's about making everyone else better." One of the greatest basketball players of all time. And also someone known for elevating the level of every teammate he plays with. Not by yelling. But by leading through example.
Personally, leadership taught me more than hockey itself. When I started leading people -- whether in the locker room or off the ice -- I understood what discipline really means. Not the forced kind, but the kind you choose for yourself. I understood what responsibility means. Not just for my own performance, but for the team's mood, the energy at practice, for making sure the guy next to me knows he matters.
And most importantly, I understood communication. I'll say it honestly: I learned to communicate better on the ice than in any course or classroom. Because in a game, you don't have time for diplomatic detours. You have to be clear, concise, and fair. And that's exactly the skill you'll use your entire life -- at work, in relationships, in business. No school teaches you these things. Sports does. And specifically, leading a team is one of the greatest lessons a sports career can give you.
5 principles of leadership in sports
In the e-book The Mental Edge, there's an entire section dedicated to leadership. Five complete techniques that show you how to become a leader -- not the kind who yells, but the kind people follow. Here I'll give you the core of each one. The full step-by-step methods are in the book.
#21: Lead by example
Your behavior is louder than your words. When you say "we need to work harder" and you're the one resting, nobody takes you seriously. When you say nothing and you're the first one into the sprint, everyone follows. People don't follow what you say. They follow what you do. This principle is the foundation of all leadership -- and in the e-book, I break it down into a concrete method you can use at your very next practice. Because leading by example isn't about grand gestures. It's about small things you do over and over. Every day.
#22: Communicate
Say what you need. Don't assume everyone knows. Say it out loud. In the locker room, on the field, on the bench. Most problems on teams aren't about talent. They're about people assuming others know what they're thinking. They don't. Good leadership starts like this: open, clear, no unnecessary padding. Sometimes one sentence at the right moment is all it takes. Sometimes a question works better than an order. In the e-book, you'll find specific scenarios for putting this into practice -- including situations you know from your own locker room.
#23: Lift others up
Praise teammates publicly. Criticize privately. Sounds simple, but almost nobody does it. When you say in front of the whole team after a game, "Did you guys see how Martin intercepted that breakaway in the second period?" -- Martin remembers that. And next time, he'll make two great plays. But if you call out his mistake in front of everyone, he'll retreat into his shell and be afraid to take risks. This isn't just nice theory. It's a tool that changes the energy of an entire team. And in the e-book, I show you how to use it systematically -- not randomly, but as a part of your leadership approach.
#24: Take responsibility
A leader takes responsibility for the result, not just their own performance. When the team loses, a leader doesn't say "I did my job." They say "What could we have done better?" The difference is enormous. Because in that moment, you're showing the entire locker room that you're in it together. That nobody's alone. That the result belongs to the whole team -- including you. This shift in thinking -- from "me" to "we" -- is exactly what separates a player from a leader. The complete technique for applying this in real situations is in the e-book.
#25: Be consistent
100% at every practice, not just at games. This might be the hardest principle of all. Because everyone can bring intensity when the stadium is full. But what about Tuesday morning practice when it's raining and nobody feels like it? That's exactly where leaders are born. In those moments when it's easiest to let up. Consistency isn't sexy, but it's precisely what separates average players from the ones others follow. In the e-book, I show you how to build consistency as a habit -- not as something that requires endless willpower, but as a system that works automatically.
These five principles aren't a random list. They're designed to build on each other. You start with yourself (lead by example), then work with the people around you (communicate, lift others up), then take responsibility for the whole (take responsibility), and finally hold it all together day after day (be consistent).
Each of these principles works on its own. But when you combine them, you get something most teams don't have -- a leader people follow voluntarily. Not because they have to, but because they want to. And that's the biggest difference of all.
The full "Leadership" section with 5 complete techniques is in the e-book The Mental Edge
Leaders aren't born -- leaders are trained. 25 mental techniques for athletes. Leadership is one of five categories.
Learn more →What you can do tomorrow
Everything I wrote above is great. But if you don't act on it, it's just another article you read and forgot. So here are three concrete steps. No big plans. No complicated systems. Three things you can do as early as tomorrow.
At your next practice: arrive first, leave last
Sounds basic. But try it. Show up to the locker room before anyone else. Start getting ready when nobody's there yet. And after practice, be the last one out. Not because you have to, but because you want to. This small gesture tells the entire team more than any speech. It says: "I'm here, I'm giving it everything, and I'm not leaving until it's done." People notice. They might not say it out loud, but they notice. And in a few weeks, they'll start doing the same. Because example is contagious. And a good example is the most contagious thing of all.
In the locker room: tell a teammate specifically what they did well
Not "good game." That's an empty phrase and you both know it. Say: "That play in the second half where you tracked back and broke up the counter-attack -- that was incredible." Specific praise has a hundred times more impact than general praise. Because it shows you noticed. That you pay attention to what they do. That you care. And your teammate will remember it. Next time, they'll play even harder. Not because someone told them to, but because they know someone's watching. And that's exactly the kind of motivation that works long-term.
After a loss: instead of finding someone to blame, say "What can we do better?"
A loss is a test. Not a test of your strength or talent, but a test of your character. When the whole team is sitting in the locker room in silence, you have two options. Either look for whose fault it was. Who missed the chance, who didn't track back, who let the team down. Or say: "Hey, we lost. What can we do better next time?" The second option is harder. Because it requires you to push past the frustration and look forward. But that's exactly what a leader does. They don't point fingers. They point the way. And a team that looks forward after a loss instead of backward is a team that wins next time.
Three steps. None of them require talent, experience, or an armband. You can start doing any of them tomorrow. And if you do them every week, within a month you'll notice that something around you has changed. People will follow you. Not because someone told them to. But because they see you mean it.
Why leadership is the most important skill from sports
A lot of athletes think the most important thing they take from sports is physical fitness. Or technique. Or discipline. But I'd argue it's leadership. And here's why.
Once you understand how to motivate people, how to communicate under pressure, how to raise the energy in a room full of frustrated people -- that skill never leaves you. You'll use it at work when you lead a team. You'll use it in business when you need people to trust you. You'll use it in your personal life when things get tough and someone needs you to show the way.
Physical fitness fades with time. Technique rusts when you have nowhere to play. But the ability to lead people? It grows with every year. And the more you use it, the better you get. That's why it's so important to learn leadership now -- when you're training it every single day in real situations. On the field, in the locker room, on the bench. That's your laboratory. That's your school. And the lessons you learn there, you carry with you for life.
Every great sports leader -- whether it's LeBron, Messi, or Gretzky -- has one thing in common. They weren't just great players. They were people who made everyone around them better. Who didn't just focus on their own performance, but on the performance of the entire team. And that's exactly the skill you carry far beyond the playing field.
How leadership shows up outside of sports
Let me tell you something that genuinely surprised me. When I finished playing hockey and started working in a completely different field, I expected to be starting from zero. I expected that everything I'd learned on the ice would stay there. But that's not what happened.
My first day at the new job, I could see how the team worked. Who talked, who stayed quiet, who was afraid to speak up, who went above and beyond. And I immediately knew what to do. Not because I had experience in that industry -- I didn't. But because I'd spent years training leadership in the locker room. And the principles are exactly the same.
When someone on the team doesn't know what to do -- communicate. When someone did great work -- lift them up. When something went wrong -- take responsibility instead of looking for blame. When nobody feels like it -- lead by example and start yourself. They're the same principles. Just a different jersey.
This isn't theory. This is the reality lived by thousands of former athletes who discovered that their biggest competitive advantage isn't speed or strength. It's the ability to lead people. At work, in business, in relationships. Everywhere there are people -- and that's everywhere -- you need the ability to lead. And sports prepared you for it better than you think.
Common mistakes of beginner leaders
Not everything that looks like leadership actually is leadership. A lot of young athletes think that leading means yelling. That a leader is the loudest person in the locker room. Who makes a scene after every mistake. Who bosses everyone around. But that's not leadership. That's noise. And noise doesn't inspire people. Noise makes people nervous. Noise builds fear, not respect. And fear never works long-term.
Another mistake: thinking you have to have all the answers. A leader isn't someone who knows everything. A leader is someone who admits when they don't know something -- and then figures it out. Who says "I don't know, but let's work it out together." That kind of honesty builds trust faster than any confident speech. Because people can spot fake confidence. And they can also spot when someone is real.
And the third one: treating leadership as a one-time event. One big speech in the locker room after a loss and done, I'm a leader. No. Leadership is a daily habit. It's the extra sprint at practice. It's greeting your teammate on Monday morning. It's the question "how are you?" before a game. They're small things you do consistently. Every day. And that's exactly why I named the fifth principle "be consistent" -- because without consistency, everything else falls apart. You can give one great speech, but if you slack off at the next practice, nobody believes you.
Final thoughts
You don't have to be the best player on the team. You don't need an armband. You don't need ten seasons under your belt. The only thing you need is a decision. The decision to start leading today. Not through speeches. Not through grand gestures. But by showing up to practice and giving more than yesterday. By telling a teammate what they did well. By looking forward after a loss instead of looking for someone to blame.
Leadership can't be given. Leadership can be trained. Just like shots, passes, or conditioning. And when you train it, you become an athlete people follow -- and a person who'll use that skill for the rest of their life. On the field and off it. In a jersey and in a suit. In the locker room and in the boardroom.
Start tomorrow. One step. One practice. One word. And then another. And another. Because a leader isn't someone who did one big thing once. A leader is someone who does the small things right. Over and over. Every day.
Tip: All 5 leadership techniques are available in the e-book The Mental Edge: 25 Mental Techniques for Athletes.